Attention: Why Every Married Man Needs A Girlfriend | MadNaija Attention: Why Every Married Man Needs A Girlfriend | MadNaija

Attention: Why Every Married Man Needs A Girlfriend

TRUTH be told, husbands need girlfriends. Yes, you heard me right and that is the same reason you will find side chicks boasting and telling the wives to thank them for saving their marriages because they keep their ‘man’ happy.


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So every man deserves a girlfriend!

I know someone is saying “this one has lost her mind”. No, am fine and still wish everyone to have a happy and successful marriage.

I promise you, I haven’t lost my mind (at least not completely…). I’m not suggesting that your husband needs a girlfriend on the side. But I am suggesting that, every once in a while, he needs you to be his “girlfriend.” Of course, what every husband primarily needs is a loving and committed life partner. But every now and then, husbands need a little bit of “girlfriend treatment.” Same applies to women, once in a while they also need “boyfriend treatment”.

Obviously, life as a married couple is a lot busier and more complicated than life as a dating couple. And you may think that being his girlfriend is a “frill” something you might have time and money for in the future, but definitely not today. If that’s what you are feeling, I want to encourage you to rethink that idea.

Keeping your marriage fresh, alive and fun may depend m on you, every once in a while, acting like your husband’s girlfriend. Whatever special treatment they are hunting for from side chicks, they have to get it home and stop wasting money on those ‘girlfriends’.

I know, when you are working hard, raising children and trying to keep all of your balls in the air that sounds like a pretty tall order. So, given those real-life limitations, what might the “girlfriend treatment” look like? Fortunately l got a few ideas that can work for even the busiest wife and mom. Pick one or two and give them a try. Remember what attracted you to him and focus on those things.

When you first dated your husband, you found some things about him very attractive. Was it his good looks, his smile, his sense of humour, the way he always made others feel comfortable, his honesty or the way he always worked hard until the job was done?

Make a list in your mind, paper, or on your phone and focus on it for several days. During that time, put the little things that annoy you about him out of your mind.

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When you were his girlfriend, you probably focused on the positives and praised him a lot. So now that you are thinking again about the things that attracted you to your husband, praise him and thank him for those things.

Tell him what you appreciate about him. Thank him for the things that he does for you and your family.

Do this consistently over a number of days and try to avoid criticizing him during that time. If this feels awkward, start with something small or non-threatening such as “I love the way you play with the kids when you get home from work. Thank you for taking care of the family, you are the best.” Whenever possible, praise him in front of other people.

“I’m so lucky that Hloniphani is handy around the house. I do not think I would have finished my degree if he hadn’t taken on more than his share with the kids and the house.”

Those small praises and appreciating goes a long way. Of course, this doesn’t mean ignoring problems in your marriage or pretending that he never does anything wrong. I’m just suggesting that you take some time to focus on the positive for a few days and let go of some minor annoyances.

The other thing they enjoy, is that treatment of being a man. Your husband isn’t your sister or one of your girlfriends nor one of your children. He is a man and he is your man. So treat him like one. Enjoy his masculinity, even if some aspects of it annoy you at times.

If he wants to take care of something around the house, let him do it his way. If he wants the two of you to do something together, let him plan it and enjoy what he plans. And please, don’t ever treat him like a child.

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I have seen and you probably have too, a wife chastise her husband in public as if he was a disobedient child. That is so destructive to a marriage, whether done publicly or privately. Of course, you can disagree with your husband or criticise something he has done, but always in private and always as one adult to another.

One of the things that makes dating so exciting is that it’s full of surprises. Often you don’t know what to expect, and everything feels new. Girlfriends want to impress their boyfriends and vice versa. After a couple of years of marriage, however, most of people fall into a routine and forget about the art of surprise. So think like your husband’s girlfriend.

You know him better now than you did when you were dating him, what kind of surprises would he enjoy? Plan several things over a few days or a weekend. Would he like a favourite meal, a massage, a gift, time to work alone on a project or time for the two of you to watch sports or a movie he likes? Be creative and keep the focus on his surprise and enjoyment.

When you were dating, you probably “dressed” for your husband regularly, whether dressing up to go out or wearing his favourite pair of jeans or top around the house. But for most busy women with kids, jobs and responsibilities those days are long gone.

You can’t dress up every day like you are going on a hot date and neither can I. But you dress sexy on occasion! So think about the things your husband likes you to wear and wear those things once in a while.

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Whether or not you and you husband had sex before you were married, you probably felt very sexually attracted to him when you were dating. Now, maybe not so much. Instead, you are busy, stressed and above all really, really tired. In addition, you may have started to believe one of the great lies of culture that the best sex happens in new relationships between people who aren’t married.

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No, the best sex can and should happen between two people who are married and committed to each other for life. So while you are focusing some attention on being your husband’s girlfriend, work on rekindling the sexual attraction that you first felt for him.

Try taking the lead and initiating sex. Wear something that makes you feel confident and sexy. Consider trying something a little bit new or different. Use scents and music that make you feel sensual.

Above all, cultivate a positive mindset and plan to enjoy sex and intimacy with your husband. Almost every man desperately wants to know that his wife is still turned on by him and enthusiastic about enjoying sex with him.

I guess you now agree that your husband needs a girlfriend every now and then. Men love having a sexy wife and being paid attention to and your man deserves it to the fullest!!

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I guess you now agree that your husband needs a girlfriend every now and then. Men love having a sexy wife and being paid attention to and your man deserves it to the fullest!!

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